Hello ,

As you read this I’m winging my way to a return engagement in Tokyo to conduct a Leadership Seminar for aspiring Japanese leaders assembled by ASK Global, a fast growing Japanese training company.  I’ll be working through my friend and talented trainer/interpreter Yuko Osora and know the experience will be valuable for all – especially ME!

April is Child Abuse Prevention Month in the USA which represents a reminder to do what we can to end the individual, family and community tragedies of child abuse and neglect.  Two of my children had very rough beginnings to their lives and my family knows first hand of the struggle these kids must confront just to achieve what most of us would call “normal” lives.

We are blessed here in Colorado to have resident the Kempe Center for the Prevention and Treatment of Child Abuse and Neglect.  Their work includes hosting national and international research, education and training of professionals in the field.  I’m proud that my small contribution included funding that division’s home base in Kempe’s headquarters.  You can learn more about Kempe, their work and how you might participate at http://www.kempe.org.

Each year the Kempe Awards ceremony honors people who have made a difference in the lives of abused and neglected children, raises some much-needed funds and celebrates the year’s accomplishments.  Our entertainment this year was the four-time Grammy Award winning songstress and Colorado native, Diane Reeves and her trio in the beautiful new Ellie Calkins Opera House. 

I wish you all could have been there – it was a night that mirrored Kempe’s motto:  Renowned Experts, Remarkable Compassion and Real Hope...and it was great fun!

Our feature this month is excerpted from my book “Living an Extraordinary Life” (available, signed and inscribed of course, at http://www.ExtraordinaryBook.com) and focuses on the empowering and rewarding act of serving others.

Be extraordinary!

Robert White
Robert@ExtraordinaryBook.com

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In this issue:

• Our Feature Article:Be selfish: Give, Give, Give – then give some more
• Extraordinary Wisdom Quotes of the Month
• Rave Recommendation
• Pre-Publication Orders Being Accepted for the Revised, Third Edition of
  “Living an Extraordinary Life”
• Extraordinary Living Action Steps

Of the many thousands of people who complete our more advanced personal effectiveness program, The Breakthrough Experience, ninety-nine percent of them will be bouncing off the walls with excitement.  Ask them why, and you’ll get many different answers.  In truth, all the answers are just differing forms of a single underlying answer: "I've just spent 40 intensive hours giving of myself to others."  Our discovery is that a high percentage of the petty neurosis that plague citizens of the developed world ‘clear up’ the moment people get outside their self-involvement and simply give to others.

'Awareness' is the central theme and focus of The Breakthrough Experience yet giving of oneself is the vehicle for participation, learning and success.  We’ve designed these four intensive days so that in numerous ways, participants have a direct experience of giving of themselves.  They experience this giving deeply, although they may not be able to immediately articulate exactly what it was they were doing.  When a participant shares a story from his or her life with emotional honesty, that is an act of giving to others.  And in many other ways – being honest, participating fully and spontaneously, showing up authentically – students are able to give to one another.

Of course, it is not only in our seminars that giving of oneself to others is a powerfully fulfilling experience.  Well documented findings of the last few thousand years of human civilization prove that the most direct and satisfying way to be enriched and rewarded in life is to give.  And, contrary to some people’s beliefs, giving is also the most direct way to get what you want.  I’m sure you’ve heard dozens of philosophical statements supporting this view.  Here's one from Jeffrey Moses:

"The giving of money, time, support and encouragement to worthy causes can never be detrimental to the giver.  The laws of nature are structured so that acts of charity will open an individual to an unbounded reservoir of riches."

Giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin.  To take from people and from life, without giving in return, is an empty, shallow and unrewarding experience.  When we give, we automatically receive.  We have the privilege of feeling good about the gift, and about who we are as a giver.  In my direct personal experience, most people discover that true joy is sourced in treating life not as a place to get things, but as a place to give oneself to others.

As a small child, perhaps you preferred to receive Christmas and birthday gifts rather than to give them.  As an adult, I am willing to bet you would rather experience the joy of thinking about, buying and giving a gift, than receiving one.  Why stop there?  Why not give of yourself all the time, and feel the richness of giving all the time?  Why do we hold back from giving?  It is, after all, our natural state.  We are born to give.

Human beings have an infinite capacity for two things: giving and love.  Do you think Mother Teresa ever ran out of love and care to give to the sick and the destitute?  At nearly 85 years of age, and with a weak heart, she was still out there giving; traveling and speaking, caring and working as she had been every day since she was a novice.  That’s because giving nourishes and replenishes the giver.  Taking depletes us and burns us out.

Are you a giver or a taker?

Look at the life of the thousands of everyday heroes in your community and you know that there are givers in the world, people who in most every situation ask: “What can I contribute here?  What can I give?”  People who choose to live life in that way inspire us and allow us to be in touch with our own natural inclination to give.

Then look around at the apathy, greed, violence, child abuse, and discrimination in the world, and you know that there are takers as well.  People who ask: “What’s in it for me?  What can I get?”

You and I have plenty of excuses for being takers.  Ultimately those excuses all come back to our underlying beliefs.  You might believe you have only a finite amount to give, as if you'll somehow show up empty, like a car that has run out of gas, when you give.  People are actually the opposite of motor vehicles.  We are only empty when we don't give of ourselves.

Or maybe you gave to someone many times, only to feel like it was always thrown back in your face.  Or perhaps you felt your giving went unappreciated.  If you’ve experienced your giving being rejected, or unacknowledged, you probably have a belief that giving is either painful or not worth the trouble.  Better to look out for Number One, you think, otherwise nobody else will.  It is useful to remember that giving is, in a way, both a selfish and self-less act.  It is a win/win game.  Both the giver and the receiver benefit.  What we know for certain is that in the game called 'taking', nobody wins.

My former wife Dianna and I experienced the privilege, the joy and the challenges of adopting two children with special needs – Levi and Emily.  Both experienced truly horrific beginnings to their lives with somewhat predictable behavioral problems when they joined our family.  Often someone would say, with the best of intentions, “you’re so wonderful to have done this for these children.”  We learned to simply say, in most circumstances, “Thank you” and acknowledge that yes, we did contribute to their development into wonderful young people.

What was more real for us – and what we learned many people could not quite accept – would have been to share openly how much each of us gained from whatever contribution we made to Levi and Emily.  These children of the heart and spirit, through their respective and unique life journeys, assisted Dianna and me in healing our own damaged inner child.  As they struggled to become whole in spite of their rough beginnings, they taught us so much and our gratitude is total.

I want to be able to say this in way that penetrates deep into your being:  Everything I’ve learned about this complicated existence called ‘being human’ and amplified by the experience of working with Levi and Emily and with hundreds of thousands of people, tells me that most or even all of the average person’s neuroses and hang-ups disappear when they start giving and serving others.  It’s that simple.  If you’re feeling “down” or ineffective or confused or all those conditions where you’re being in a less-resourceful state … just find a way to give, to contribute to others.  Doing that will transform your experience of life from ordinary to extraordinary more than any other single known choice.

*** excerpted from “Living an Extraordinary Life” by Robert White.  More information and your signed copy is available at:

http://www.extraordinarybook.com

Our theme this month is serving others, so here are a few of my favorite quotes on that subject.

Diane Reeves won yet another Grammy for her musical soundtrack to “Good Night and Good Luck” and it is available for only $12.98 at

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/customer-reviews/B000ASDGE4/ref=cm_cr_dp_pt/102-9782895-9368150?%5Fencoding=UTF8&n=5174&s=music

or for a few bucks more at your local music store.

These timeless songs from the forties and fifties take on a new life with interpretations that call to mind Billy Holiday, Ella Fitzgerald, Sarah Vaughn …. but are uniquely delivered by Diane Reeves.

It’s a musical treat!

As a gift to yourself, to friends or colleagues...this book is based on intensive work with over 500,000 people worldwide and clearly demonstrates that we all have everything it takes to live an extraordinary life – if we are willing to take charge of our lives and discover the true meaning of personal responsibility.

Available for shipping May 10th and only $19.95. 

In addition to endorsements from Ken Blanchard, Tom Crum, Jerry Jampolsky, Alexander Everett and Hyler Bracey, readers’ reviews from Amazon.com include:

“If you just want to read one book this year on enhancing personal power, read this, it is refreshing and thought provoking.”
 
                    Sidney Yuen, Chairman & CEO, HK Benchmarking Clearinghouse

“I have benefited from Robert's experience, insight and wisdom for a number of years.  One of Robert's great gifts is helping others live an extraordinary life.  He has captured his gift in the pages of this book to the benefit of all of us that read it.  I personally found it to be of such great value that I have sent many copies to my clients.  A book really has to be of the highest value for me to personally endorse it, send it to my clients and put my credibility on the line.  Living an Extraordinary Life always hits the mark.”

                    William Adams, CEO, Maxcomm Inc.

“This book is moving, engaging and profound.  I intend to read it every couple of years. Rich with insights, it gave me both perspective and inspiration. Add it to your must-read list!”

                    Jimmy Calano, co-founder of Career Track and author of Make Your Move

“I found the book to be full of practical wisdom and insight. It was so full that I read a little each night and found that the lessons helped focus me the next day. I found it to be a really good read for living a better life.”

                    Robert Wright, Founder and CEO, Wright Learning Inc.

“This is the most powerful book I have ever read about accepting responsibility for every thing in your life and the power that it has to change your attitude in so many ways. I was impressed with Robert White's no nonsense style and the ability he had to cut through all of my distorted thinking habits.”

                    Shaun Jones, President, The Paradigm Group

In the new edition the cartoons from the hardcover first edition have been restored due to popular demand and the text is even more powerful.  You can purchase your own signed and/or inscribed copy at:

http://www.ExtraordinaryBook.com

To get volume pricing, e mail Robert directly at:  Robert@ExtraordinaryBook.com

The action step here is to re-read the last paragraph from the book excerpt and then......do it!

“I want to be able to say this in way that penetrates deep into your being:  Everything I’ve learned about this complicated existence called ‘being human’ and amplified by the experience of working with Levi and Emily and with hundreds of thousands of people, tells me that most or even all of the average person’s neuroses and hang-ups disappear when they start giving and serving others.  It’s that simple.  If you’re feeling “down” or ineffective or confused or all those conditions where you’re being in a less-resourceful state … just find a way to give, to contribute to others.  Doing that will transform your experience of life from ordinary to extraordinary more than any other single known choice.”

Wishing you an Extraordinary Life and Extraordinary Organizations...

Robert White
Extraordinary People International
1461 S Ulster St
Denver, CO 80231Phone: 1-303-632-7744
E-mail: Robert@extraordinarypeople.com

http://www.extraordinarypeople.com

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